2026 phoenix wasted open: 3rd round update

The greatest race in golf 🏃

Welcome to the Breakfast Club, @WMPhoenixOpen. pic.twitter.com/c2KO2yvYDH

— PGA TOUR (@PGATOUR) February 7, 2026

^ real talk: irrefutable empirical evidence that females are more cognitively advanced than males!!

https://instagr.am/p/DUZbu0rj_bv
^ real talk: them cbyf1s are targeting a berkeley, stanford or ivy league grad husband (dang)!!

michael kim (72, tied for 25th): missing half the fairways (7 outta 14) no es bueno & resulted in just a one birdie round on the drivable par 4 17th hole

max homa (75, tied for 63rd): yikes, only 5 outta 14 fairways off the tee box on a baked out tpc scottsdale (and no spilled beer does not agronomically facilitate grass growing & ****)

collin morikawa (71, tied for 63rd): the week in a capsule moment: collin throws a gap wedge dart 10 feet away left of the pin on the 25,000+ stadium par 3 16th hole...it's almost a dead flat green but with downtown phoenix to the right the correct greens read is either firm left edge or a quarter ball left at dying drip speed...morikawa misreads the line as dead straight with no situational awareness of the valley effect & his putt is right of the cup never having a chance

yeah shocky is working on a project & it's called you, he's contacted the thunderbird tournament director & the pga director in charge of playing competition requesting that max & collin be paired together tomorrow to facilitate my coaching/developing responsibilities

https://instagr.am/p/DUZ1cnXkWtL


woof, woof, woof, i cry (who gives a **** let's live it up plz pick up my calls)#

Baker Mayfield on Cal getting Jordan Sommerville as OC

“He’s my guy. Unbelievable football mind. Works his tail off, being with him the last three years and the work ethic he has, the hours he’s put in, they’re getting a great coach. I’m sad to see him go but I know he’s going… pic.twitter.com/sY22wnI6dU

— Thomas Dunn (@Thomasdunn24) February 6, 2026

finally NFL level coaching in berkeley, back in the day coach cuonzo martin taught/developed NBA level defense



https://instagr.am/p/CpqZKRYPNHC
cal's MONSTER class#

2026 phoenix wasted open: 4th round update
^ real talk: tpc scottsdale is NOT golf course architecturally in the top 15 courses in north scottsdale

https://instagr.am/p/C3LKgK1x3fC
michael kim (67, tied for 18th): a second 8 birdie round this week (that's how u get PAID on the pga tour) including a dramatic curling birdie bomb on the par 18th hole (with 25,000+ fans screaming wildly) after utilizing the monster tee ball strategy of aiming the drive away from the dangers down the left side & at the scoreboard flanking the bleachers down the right side!!

collin morikawa (69, tied for 54th): on his opening hole collin struck his iron 2nd shot into the middle of the green leaving a 35 footer directly into the mcdowell mountains away from downtown phoenix...with a complete lack of situational awareness of the valley effect or caddie assistance from experienced mark urbanek morikawa then left his birdie putt into the grain 10 feet short (which caused a couple of rando fans near me to exclaim "dude, that's the worst putt we've seen all week!!")...sigh

max homa (72, tied for 66th): what time is the super bowl party??

Still can’t believe how early @maxhoma23 celebrated this putt pic.twitter.com/H0h8mGg9nI

— Tour Golf (not PGA Tour) (@PGATUOR) September 25, 2022

fun fact: max & collin played together as requested, once again plz let me know ur preferred football gameday kickoff times for this fall so shocky can work with espn & the acc commish to ensure our very busy people needs are met, got it??

did the cali berkeley bears win the 2026 SUPER BOWL or something??#

https://instagr.am/p/DUg8n_SD8ML
ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: this is the 9th consecutive post by shocky, he cannot post again unless there is monster reader posts/engagement per the rules of of the bearinsider.com

Hawk and Woodson are ballin'

https://instagr.am/p/DUg1bn7DfQF
california golden bears 95
pittsburgh panthers 80

yeah nfl taker/berkeley grad nohl williams cbyf1/future wifey with a rock on her finger lulu "let it fly" twidale is arguably the most MARKETABLE women's athlete in the history of cal athletics!!

https://instagr.am/p/DUgut9ZiTEd
there should be 10,000+ fans this upcoming week at haas pavillion for both of the bears (15-10) acc battles against virginia (17-7) & virginia tech (18-7) in the quest for a spot in the 2026 ncca tournament in the wildly women's basketball supportive san francisco bay area as evidenced by the wnba valkyries thru imaginative/creative marketing averaging 18,064 fans this season

but we all know that's NOT gonna happen because of the absolute dereliction of duties by co athletic director JENNIFER SIMON-O'NEIL...the bears are once again near the basement of the acc in wbb attendance despite the generational marketing talent in lulu & a 2025 ncca tournament team

chancellor lyons, ur retaining this EVIL as **** worthless bureaucrat (who is hated/not respected not only by donors but also the rest of the athletic department with the exception of her fellow anti football ****tard jay larson who got the personality/fundraising ability of a dead squirrel) is not only disrespecting the suicidal women's swimmers & their families but also dooming the women's basketball program in addition to the beyond ****** up softball & volleyball coaching failures under her watch

rich, this **** is 100% on you & does NOT reflect the values and potential of women's athletics at the university of california, berkeley

Numerous Cal Swimmers Accuse Coach Teri McKeever of Verbal Abuse “For Decades” https://t.co/Rzavmnz0iQ

— SwimSwam (@swimswamnews) May 24, 2022

FACT: Shocky is in communication with multiple former Cal women's swimmers and their families re: the years of abuse that was enabled by JENNIFER SIMON-O'NEIL & ignored by the then Director of Compliance JAY LARSON (who looked the other way re: egregious Title IX violations). These young women's lives have been forever damaged by their Berkeley experiences.

FACT: Shocky is in possession of multiple legal documents pertaining to the abuse inflicted including the confidential Munger report that was not released to me via a public information request. This is a shocking report that makes the reader want to throw up and disassociate with Cal Athletics.

FACT: Shocky is in possession of an email directory listing for the University's largest donors, The Builders of Berkeley.

If Chancellor Lyons still employs JENNIFER SIMON-O'NEIL and JAY LARSON in any capacity including but not limited to serving as Co Athletic Directors after their current contracts expire on July 1, 2026 it's possible that unredcated highlighted portions documenting the racism and other abuses that resulted in multiple swimmers having suicidal iterations will be sent by an untraceable 3rd party to The Builders of Berkeley, the UC Board of Regents and selective national media outlets including the New York Times.

Fundraising for Berkeley at that point will be very challenging in addition to national scrutiny upon the University.

FAFO#

Shocky1 said:

---

shocky talking ball/strategizing the bishop o'dowd pipeline with fellow hopa/hopa berkeley grad dragons head coach lou richie back in the day when the bears started 4 future nba ballers & sharpshooter jordan mathews playing in front of SOLD OUT 11,000+ fans on big time gamedays in an insane energy haas pavilion!!

yeah shocky is a class act, he moved over down the row (flip flopped seats) as a courtesy to allow mrs spieker to watch the action on the floor/not block her view when the monster stands the whole game shouting instructions like "demand the ball, ivan, demand the ball!!" as part of his coaching duties on behalf of cal's monster class

the MAGIC of cal basketball!!#

---

Thoughts from the WM:

-I truly enjoy coming to this tournament. There’s very few tournaments that bring this level of energy. The atmosphere plus the design of the golf course fit really well together.

-There’s always the few idiots that make everyone else look bad. I feel for… pic.twitter.com/dxmSIeyiwK

— Michael S. Kim (@Mike_kim714) February 9, 2026

^ that's the shockster (wearing white shorts, a white vilebrequin t-shirt, black balenciaga kicks & a cal cap, apparently he got a resting biatch face) posting up by the hole sign below the blimp making sure his poly brah michael gets his 8 birdies in the final round!!

yeah u gotta have faith that the monster knows wut the **** he's talking about, it always (ok maybe most of the time) works out!!

𝐂𝐮𝐭𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 @CoachLup 💈#GoBears pic.twitter.com/X0Du8fceoH

— Cal Football (@CalFootball) February 10, 2026

https://instagr.am/p/DUbR0WBAGFH
nice trim, coach#

https://instagr.am/p/BAfUVPTSKrz

https://instagr.am/p/DRVaEpbAc7i
look shocky got zero ******* interest in the nfl, nba, mlb & the olympics, got it??

but this female figure skating is literally the greatest sport in the history of planet earth, the competitions are dominated by cbyf1s with smokeshow ponytails!!

https://instagr.am/p/DTl0EFqjNA0


ponytails are cute & cute holds up way the **** better than sexy over time#
^ another brilliant fortune cookie insert by the monster, he does this **** with no effort

2027 high school recruiting updates:

june 4-7th official visits:

Let’s Work !!🐻 @CoachLup @CoachDBrown27 @CoachHutch_ @CoachHeyward pic.twitter.com/OekMLblPFG

— Duvay Williams (@DuvayAllday) February 14, 2026

3.2 gpa ELITE potential day 1 starter +1 athletic duvay williams from serra high school (gardena)

Excited to announce my first official visit to Cal!!@AnaeCoach @GregBiggins @BrandonHuffman @adamgorney pic.twitter.com/FpS9cdPdGA

— Isaiah (@Isaiah_Bertola) February 11, 2026

#1 ranked hawaii offensive lineman 6'5" 305 lbs isaiah bertola from campbell high school (ewa beach)

june 11-14th official visits:

Blessed to announce my visit to @CalFootball @CoachLup @DlineCoachEd @Big_Ursa_ @CoachBarraza @CReedGHS @SydQuanThompson pic.twitter.com/BAKdZwBkei

— Giovanni Hodge (@GioHodge707) February 12, 2026

4.0 gpa 2027 cal commit apex predator defensive lineman giovanni hodge from grant high school

Locked in! #StayHome???@CoachLup @CoachHutch_ @CoachDBrown27 @_CoachBoyd @CoachHeyward @si_one11 @PadreFootball_ @coachwalsh20 @coachmons @Ogthetruth @ActivatedSP pic.twitter.com/Xf5iTFk0cY

— Malakai Taufoou ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ (@Malakai_Taufoou) February 11, 2026

bay area priority impact prospect with 22 mph SPEED defensive back malakai taufoou from serra high school

Yessir! June 11-14th @CalFootball @CoachLup @_CoachBoyd @CoachHutch_ @CoachDBrown27 @si_one11 @coachwalsh20 @coachmons @Ogthetruth @ActivatedSP @Samchung_4 @BrandonHuffman @adamgorney pic.twitter.com/QqfCpzdd3l

— Jeovanni Henley⭐️⭐️⭐️ (@JeovanniHenley) February 11, 2026

3.3 gpa potential hometown hero +1 athletic jeovanni henley from serra high school

Cal OV locked in! @DavidOrtega_40 @KbTheStable pic.twitter.com/QYfnN5Roei

— Malachi McFarland (@_Malachi14) February 13, 2026

game breaking 4.4 SPEED running back malachi mcfarland from damien high school

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (not just the "country" aka united states, our head coach is a dumb azz)

https://instagr.am/p/C_lpPA4vJ0j

-Some highlights of my round.

-8 was downwind and I hit driver over the trees and drove the green.

-15 was 138 yds straight into a wind… I hit a really nice low 7i that normally goes 185 and it came up 15 yds short in the bunker. Ball was going backwards when it landed. The… pic.twitter.com/b9SSO2HIss

— Michael S. Kim (@Mike_kim714) February 10, 2026

the sistine chapel of golf#

california golden bears yucky blucky fruitcake classes (mr spieker not amused cuz he got worser seats):

doechii, why don't you introduce the yucky blucky fruitcakes to the class?

2027 class:

zach brien, kicker (3.8 gpa)
gunnar perry, linebacker (3.7 gpa)
giovanni hodge, edge defender (4.0 gpa)

2026 class:

david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
jacob johnson, punter (3.1 gpa)
sosaia noa, tight end (3.0+ gpa)
roger vaderhoef, offensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
rico walker, tight end (3.1 gpa)
aj tuitele, linebacker (3.0 gpa)
joshua pierce, edge defender (3.5 gpa)
jayden williams, defensive line (3.1 gpa)
kamar mothudi, inside linebacker (3.3 gpa)
ricky "trenches" fletcher, defensive back (3.3 gpa)
jericho johnson, defensive tackle (3.0+ gpa)
emmanuel okoye, edge defender (strong student from nigeria)
jackson brosseau, quarterback (3.96 gpa)
angus davies, punter (honor roll student from australia)
daniel harris, cornerback (3.1 gpa)
ashton rivera, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
kahlee tafai, offensive lineman (3.15 gpa)
ashun shepphard, defensive line (3.0+ gpa)
cooper perry, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
towns mcgough, kicker (4.0 gpa)
marquis "mgk" groves-killebrew (3.3 gpa)
justin beadles, defensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
tristan jernigan, inside linebacker (3.0+ gpa)
jimothy lewis jr, offensive tackle (3.4 gpa)
michael hurst jr, safety (3.0+ gpa)
chase hendricks, wide receiver (3.21 gpa)
mykeal rabess, offensive lineman (3.68 gpa)
carter vargas, running back (3.2 gpa)
ashten emory, running back (3.7 gpa)
dorian thomas, tight end (3.6 gpa)
adam mohammed, running back (3.5 gpa)
kingston lopa, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
ian strong, wide receiver (3.75 gpa)
jacob arop, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
solomon williams, edge defender (3.0+ gpa)
niles davis, athlete (3.71 gpa)
daniel mcmorris, offensive tackle (3.8 gpa)
kai meza, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
tyree "reekus" sams, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
kamo'i huihui-white, offensive lineman (3.9 gpa)
nainoa lopes, quarterback (3.57 gpa)
kingston "lucky" schirmer, defensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
esaiah wong, offensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
frank fauna jr, defensive lineman (4.0 gpa)
emmanuel "ej" morgan, wide receiver/kick returner (4.3 gpa)
taimane purcell, tight end (3.9 gpa)
nemyah telona, defensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
victor santino, running back (3.0+ gpa)
elisha faamatuainu, offensive lineman (3.0+ gpa)
jaxon pyatt, linebacker (3.4 gpa)
jonathan mckinley, linebacker (4.83 gpa)

2025 class (all former walk ons are now on schollys, CONGRATS!!):

aaron hampton, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
jordan king, wide receiver (4.38 gpa)
alonzo esparza, quarterback (4.0 gpa)
belay brummell, quarterback (3.95 gpa)
carson perry-smith, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
jayden parker, running back (4.16 gpa)
isaac torres, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
mayze bryant, defensive back (3.5 gpa)
jordan franke, longsnapper (3.81 gpa)
dean taylor-chapman, running back (4.0 gpa)
tobey weydemuller, defensive back (3.92 gpa)
jude mclellan, outside linebacker (3.9 gpa)
nate escalada, defensive back (4.23 gpa)
michael cooley, outside linebacker (3.0 gpa)
ewan arechaederra, longsnapper (3.6 gpa)
lucas vanderlind, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
bj jones, inside linebacker (3.55 gpa)
sam bjerke, offensive lineman (3.9 gpa)
cole bosica, wide receiver (4.1 gpa)
myles reber, wide receiver (3.75 gpa)
jeffrey johnson, tight end (3.7 gpa)
jack olyphant, tight end (3.72 gpa)
rj stephens, defensive lineman (3.77 gpa)
dru polidore jr, safety (3.75 gpa)
michael kern, punter (3.4 gpa)
landon morris, tight end (3.7 gpa)
jayden dixon-veal, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
lj johnson, running back (3.7 gpa)
abram murray, kicker (4.0 gpa)
brent "paco" austin, corner/nickel (3.3 gpa)
jordan sanford, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
harrison taggart, linebacker (3.9 gpa)
chase meyer, kicker (4.3 gpa)
mark hamper, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
zae smith, defensive tackle (3.37 gpa)
daveion harley, offensive lineman (3.36 gpa)
kendrick raphael, running back (3.8 gpa)
quimari shemwell, corner/nickel back (3.0+ gpa)
brandon high jr, running back (3.3 gpa)
rino monteforte, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
tj bush, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
quaron adams, wide receiver (3.0 gpa)
chris victor, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
jojo genova, offensive lineman (3.5 gpa)
erik peters, kicker (3.9 gpa)
devin brown, quarterback (4.4 gpa)
dazmin james, wide receiver (2.6 gpa)
justin hasenhuetl, interior offensive lineman (3.75 gpa)
jacob de jesus, wide receiver/kick returner (3.67 gpa)
caleb johnston, longsnapper (3.5 gpa)
simon mapa, tight end (3.47 gpa)
mason mini, tight end (3.8 gpa)
john gayer, edge defender (2.8 gpa)
jordon moko, offensive line (3.8 gpa)
jayden wayne, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
brook honoree jr, punter (3.8 gpa)
dominic ingrassia, quarterback (3.2 gpa)
jaron keawe sagapolutele, quarterback (3.75 gpa)
buom jock, inside linebacker (3.1 gpa)
leon bell, offensive tackle (3.1 gpa)
tristan dunn, safety (3.0 gpa)
lamar robinson, offensive guard (3.5 gpa)
tyson ruffins, interior offensive lineman (3.8 gpa)
lajuan owens, left tackle (3.2 gpa)
hezekiah masses, corner/nickel (2.7 gpa)
kyle cunanan, kicker (3.73 gpa)
tyson ford, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
odera okaka, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
john tofi jr, edge defender (3.8 gpa)
aiden manutai, safety (4.0 gpa)
tre' harrison, safety (4.83 gpa)
mike klisiewicz, offensive lineman (3.7 gpa)
jacob houseworth, tight end (3.15 gpa)
jae'on young, corner/nickel back (3.4 gpa)
lebron williams, defensive end (3.2 gpa)
beckham barney, inside linebacker (4.2 gpa)
anthony league, running back (3.9 gpa)
ikechukwu okafor, edge defender (3.7 gpa)
ben howard, offensive guard (3.2 gpa)
meyer swinney, hybrid wide receiver/tight end (3.75 gpa)
kaden cook, cornerback (3.4 gpa)

2024 class:

will mcdonald, left guard (3.5 gpa)
checkhsaliou fall, edge defender (3.3 gpa)
cj harris, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
serigne tounkara, edge defender (3.88 gpa)
kyion graves, wide receiver (3.3 gpa)
ryan yaites, safety (3.2 gpa)
jasiah wagoner, corner/nickel back (3.25 gpa)
tj bollers, edge defender (4.0 gpa)
corey dyches, hybrid tight end/wide receiver (3.1 gpa)
braden miller, offensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
liam johnson, inside linebacker (3.36 gpa at princeton)
khamani hudson, cornerback (3.5 gpa)
bobby engstler, punter/kicker (3.72 gpa)
jonathan "gameday" brady, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
mikey miller, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
victor stoffel, offensive tackle (motivated student in sweden)
kadarius calloway, running back (2.7 gpa)
ryan coe, kicker (3.5 gpa)
tobias merriweather, wide receiver (3.6 gpa)
ja'ir smith, defensive back (3.0+ gpa)
syris corley, offensive lineman (3.0 gpa)
rush reimer, offensive lineman (3.3 gpa)
marcus harris, defensive back (3.2 gpa)
aidan ikaika keanaaina, defensive tackle (4.0 gpa)
aiden newbill, offensive line (3.72 gpa)
isaiah crosby, safety (3.0+ gpa)
luke ferrelli, inside linebacker (4.0 gpa)
chandler rogers, quarterback (3.3 gpa)
teddye buchanan, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
josiah martin, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
jack endries, tight end (3.83 gpa)
trond grizzell, wide receiver (3.8 gpa)
bj canady, defensive tackle (3.91 gpa)
legend journey, apex predator edge defender (3.3 gpa)
ej caminong, quarterback (3.5 gpa)
dayton "dayday" aupiu, defensive back (3.51 gpa)
jamaal wiley, running back (2.75 gpa)
trevor rogers, wide receiver (3.5 gpa)
michael-anthony okwura, defensive lineman (3.4 gpa)
eze osondu, inside linebacker (3.5 gpa)
brookyln cheek, defensive back (2.9 gpa)
camden jones, tight end (2.7 gpa)
tyler knape, offensive line (3.8 gpa)

2023 class:
barrett miller, offensive lineman (4.2 hs gpa & stanford mechancial engineering degree)
taj davis, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
king doerue, running back (3.5 gpa)
isaiah ifanse, running back (3.2 gpa at montana state)
marcus scott ii, cornerback (3.3 gpa at missouri)
tidiane "frenchy" jalloh (motivated student from france)
matthew wykoff, offensive tackle (3.75 gpa)
marquez "mojo" dortch, wide receiver (2.9 gpa)
ben finley, quarterback (4.308 gpa)
patrick mcmorris, safety (3.65 gpa)
david bird, longsnapper (4.0 gpa)
marquis montgomery, wide receiver (3.4 gpa)
martin tine, offensive tackle (2.9 gpa)
stanley mckenzie, nose tackle (3.3 gpa)
david reese, outside linebacker (3.7 gpa)
sam jackson v, quarterback (2.8 gpa)
brian hightower, wide receiver (3.2 gpa)
justin williams-thomas aka j-will, running back (4.0 gpa)
asher alberding, tight end (3.85 gpa)
jt byrne, tight end (3.75 gpa)
lachlan wilson, punter (strong student from australia)
byron caldwell, running back (3.3 gpa)
sergio allen, inside linebacker (3.4 gpa)
matt littlejohn, defensive back (3.0 gpa)
jaivian "the jet" thomas, running back (3.4 gpa)
nohl williams, defensive back (3.61 gpa)
kaylin moore, defensive back (3.4 gpa)
frederick williams iii, offensive line (3.6 gpa)
zurich ashford, defensive end (3.62 gpa)
ben marshall, tight end (3.4 gpa)
ryan mcculloch, outside linebacker (4.1 gpa)
tiumalu afalava, defensive line (4.1 gpa)
cade uluave, inside linebacker (3.85 gpa)
sailasa vadrawale, defensive back (3.46 gpa)
nyziah hunter, wide receiver (2.7 gpa)
nick morrow, offensive tackle (3.7 gpa)
michael luckhurst, kicker (4.37 gpa)



wow, that was quite the introduction, doechii, we're gonna have to talk after class...don't forget to take the chicken out

https://instagr.am/p/DAb8NtkBYtv

I made the best NIL offer I could for him to consider The Learning Center, but fell short by about whatever the amount he is getting at FSU. #TLC https://t.co/Y5mEH9SRjA

— Club Pro Guy (@ClubProGuy) February 10, 2026

real talk: charlie got a **** gpa, no stanford or berkeley admissions for tiger jr

ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: this is the 9th consecutive post by shocky, he cannot post again unless there is monster reader posts/engagement per the rules of of the bearinsider.com

Cal men's team needs a win at Syracuse tonight.

Go Bears!

Shocky1 said:

---

Shocky1 said:

---

pic.twitter.com/RZ5l0VdARw

— Tosh Lupoi (@CoachLup) December 10, 2025

WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD

Best Universities in the World, 2024:

1.🇬🇧 Oxford
2.🇺🇸 Stanford
3.🇺🇸 MIT
4.🇺🇸 Harvard
5.🇬🇧 Cambridge
6.🇺🇸 Princeton
7.🇺🇸 California Institute of Technology
8.🇬🇧 Imperial College London
9.🇺🇸 Berkeley
10.🇺🇸 Yale

Times Higher Education

— World of Statistics (@stats_feed) April 29, 2024

did berkeley really hire a ******* head football coach that don't know **** about MAPS??



don't be a dumb azz (wut's ur gpa brah, r u a us american so we will be able to build up our future??)#

---

cal's monster class MAILBAG (this is ACTUAL email correspondence from this evening with chancellor lyons):

Hi Rich,

How are you??

I am fine.

Yes or No question: is it accurate to say that Berkeley is the #1 ranked public university in the WORLD (vs just the USA)??

-Shocky

____________________________________________________

Thanks Bill.

It's tricky since it's unclear how to categorize Cambridge and Oxford in the UK.

See the attached ChatGPT page on the question of whether Cambridge is considered a public university.

See also the attached page on the fact that in all five rankings that people site for US universities, Berkeley is ranked number one among publics in each of the five.

Rich

____________________________________________________

ChapGPT

Yes-Cambridge is considered a public university in the UK, but the term public works differently in the UK than in the U.S.

Why Cambridge is "public" in the UK sense

-It receives significant public funding (via the Office for Students and UK research councils).

-It is regulated by government bodies and its governance structure is established by statute.

-It does not belong to private owners; it operates as a charitable corporation.

How this differs from U.S. usage

In the U.S., public university usually means a state-owned, state-run institution (e.g., UC Berkeley). Cambridge is not run by the government in that direct way. It's autonomous, self-governing, and organized around independent colleges.

_____________________________________________________

BOTTOM LINE: berkeley is the #1 ranked public university in the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

shocky is forwarding this email correspondence with the berkeley chancellor to andrew mcgraw, chief of staff, for the cal football program with instructions that on a go forward berkeley be only referred to as the GREATEST ******* public university on planet earth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

got it??

go bears

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https://instagr.am/p/DUmLu2DAWGz
real talk: tarik glenn needs to knock some knowledge re: berkeley's world ranking into our dumb azz head coach!!

Berkeley vs UNC pic.twitter.com/NGPrgFTgwZ

— Reese Adams (@ReeseAdams76102) October 22, 2025

Shocky1 said:

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I made the best NIL offer I could for him to consider The Learning Center, but fell short by about whatever the amount he is getting at FSU. #TLC https://t.co/Y5mEH9SRjA

— Club Pro Guy (@ClubProGuy) February 10, 2026

real talk: charlie got a **** gpa, no stanford or berkeley admissions for tiger jr

ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: this is the 9th consecutive post by shocky, he cannot post again unless there is monster reader posts/engagement per the rules of of the bearinsider.com

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I find it hard to believe Stanford wouldn't admit him despite low grades.

hollywood, tiger's daughter sam alexis is matriculated at stanford but charlie got ZERO interest in reading books & ****

yeah if ur gpa is significantly worser than 3.0 the noles & the cowboys got a curated academic program for u!!

Anybody know who the first Norwegian to win a @EuropeanTour 🏆 is?#okstate | #golfschool pic.twitter.com/a9FVfEdK9I

— OSU Cowboy Golf (@OSUCowboyGolf) June 27, 2021

sad but true young man update:

one time friday nite football star in texas & former cal decommit (low gpa, didn't clear berkeley admissions) kebreion winston is transferring from baylor to the university of texas-permian basis (had never heard of this school before)

the significantly undersized 6'1" 205 lbs linebacker signing day comment last week is sad as ****: "to get a fresh start and to have another chance to provide for my family"

the adults have failed him, winston does not perceive academics & studying hard in school as the pathway to providing for his family, his odds of getting paid in the nfl are less than one thousandth of one percent

wut's ur gpa??#

calumnus said:

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Cal men's team needs a win at Syracuse tonight.

Go Bears!

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https://instagr.am/p/CmpNizQPclZ
syracuse orange 107
california golden bears 100

fiercely contested battle between two very flawed teams (one team shot a crooked azz 24% on 3 pointers & 60% of free throws while the other team got no interior d presence without its violent starting center who wuz arrested for a felony aggravated assault on his ex girlfriend at his last school) that played hard for 50 minutes

well officiated acc dogfight with permissible physicality unlike the candy azz soft ticky tack no rhythm pac 10 games back in the day, madsen needs to recruit 4s & 5s that got the +1 athleticism & mentality/physicality to play thru minor contact that's the hallmark of east coast college basketball & the 2026 ncca tournament

yeah it's almost as hard to win basketball games in up state new york as it is to get a friday nite reservation at carbone in the city

https://instagr.am/p/DTJM5qDkiFJ

https://instagr.am/p/DUoQNIskvsy
^ poor marketing decision to not include lulu's ponytail (sigh)



let it fly, lulu, let if fly (the greatest 3 point shooter in the history of cal basketball since cal's monster class jeff powers)!!#



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the world (including down under in oz on the great shark barrier reef, just ask nohl williams or something)

juarezbear said:

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Shocky1 said:

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I made the best NIL offer I could for him to consider The Learning Center, but fell short by about whatever the amount he is getting at FSU. #TLC https://t.co/Y5mEH9SRjA

— Club Pro Guy (@ClubProGuy) February 10, 2026

real talk: charlie got a **** gpa, no stanford or berkeley admissions for tiger jr

ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: this is the 9th consecutive post by shocky, he cannot post again unless there is monster reader posts/engagement per the rules of of the bearinsider.com

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I find it hard to believe Stanford wouldn't admit him despite low grades.

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dad's a college dropout

Shocky1 said:

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hollywood, tiger's daughter sam alexis is matriculated at stanford but charlie got ZERO interest in reading books & ****

yeah if ur gpa is significantly worser than 3.0 the noles & the cowboys got a curated academic program for u!!

Anybody know who the first Norwegian to win a @EuropeanTour 🏆 is?#okstate | #golfschool pic.twitter.com/a9FVfEdK9I

— OSU Cowboy Golf (@OSUCowboyGolf) June 27, 2021

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Fair enough

2026 crosby pga tournament: 1st round update

https://instagr.am/p/DUJVNYXkqQu
michael kim (68, tied for 28th): playing at pebble beach with a en fuego 6 birdies but weird azz bogey 6s on the scoreable par 5 6th & 18th holes (and a scrambling par 5 from the fronting barranca on the exploitable 2nd hole)...drained 87 feet in putts at the beach which is not surprising for one of the best putters on the pga tour/planet earth!!

collin morikawa (69, tied for 39th): playing at the harder spyglass hilll, collin is hitting laser irons close to pins which got him 5th in the field in strokes gained on approaches to the greens...but 53 feet in putts made no es bueno (all 4 birdies on putts under 4 feet)

2026 kauai college tournament: 1st round update

https://instagr.am/p/DPuJMiuEun5
sophmore boss man ziqin zhou (4 birdies) & true freshman sensation xihuan chang (5 birdies) both with crafty 69s (tied for 14th) on a tricky nicklaus design with an iconic lighthouse on the drivable par 4 16th hole...mentally tough/positive energy sihao cong with a good not great 71 (32nd place) but the other 3 bears struggled with at least 2 double bogeys (which u cannot do in competitive golf) each & the bears are a mediocre tied for 10th outta 19th teams

After round 1️⃣#GoBears pic.twitter.com/jHtDr2XvDc

— Cal Men's Golf (@CalMensGolf) February 13, 2026

Yeah Puff 👌🗣️

📺>>ACCNX#weplayforthebay|#gobears pic.twitter.com/dY8M9ekUgB

— Cal Basketball (@CalWBBall) February 13, 2026

california golden bears 64
virginia cavaliers 58

great news is another 2026 ncca tournament resume building win for the bears (16-10, 7-6 in the acc)!!

a critical factor in the key victory wuz better passing & ball handling which is benefiting from the return of true frosh puff mcmorris, only 11 turnovers for the game

virginia tech on sunday at haas pavilion will be another opportunity to earn a spot in march madness!!

let it fly, lulu, let it fly!!#

Shocky1 said:

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Work 6’5 250lbs pic.twitter.com/W6KNvkwQMu

— Giovanni Hodge (@GioHodge707) January 23, 2026

^ white people r funny!!

while u get ur beauty sleep someone somewhere is getting better & when u meet they're gonna kick ur ******* azz sideways, got it??

giovanni gets it (before the dawn in a pitch dark universe)#

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Work!! pic.twitter.com/RVBJaH0uuA

— Giovanni Hodge (@GioHodge707) February 10, 2026

100% COMMITTED! GO BEARS!@HKA_Tanalski @Chris_Sailer @CoachTinkFB @CoachBigelowIMG @ParksCochrane @hardynickerson @CoachLup pic.twitter.com/BlUJJLBgpX

— Zach Brien (@BrienZach27) February 13, 2026

KAAAAABBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!

coach zach tinker got his #1 2027 kicker target 6'2" 180 lbs zach brien who wuz a bishop o'dowd dragon (until the hardware man left as head coach) & is now at the img academy in florida for his sr season!!

zach is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.8 gpa (which makes him way the **** smarter than his dumb azz berkeley grad dad doug)

I’m excited to be visiting Cal this Saturday for Junior Day. I see the momentum that @CoachLup is building and I’m excited to be a part of it! Thank you @CoachTinkFB for the invitation! I’ve been going to Cal games since I was a kid wearing my Cal helmet so I’m very excited! Go… pic.twitter.com/hP0Yw97dTY

— Zach Brien (@BrienZach27) January 29, 2026

look the monster is never gonna make fun of anybody who throws cal football helmet fashion looks on fall gamedays at memorial stadium, got it??

https://instagr.am/p/DF4IVdmM3iv
zach squared special teams#
^ unconfirmed rumour that the bears longsnapper is petitioning the contra costa supreme court to legally change his name to zach bird or something

2026 crosby pga tournament: 2nd round update

Nature at Pebble 🦌 pic.twitter.com/x0dP2TDat1

— PGA TOUR (@PGATOUR) February 13, 2026

collin morikawa (68, tied for 27th): happy/funny moment when collin rolled in a left to right 50 footer (his longest made putt of the 2026 season) from the front fringe on the iconic par 3 17th hole for a birdie & then flashed a huge SMILE & gave a mock double fist bump in disbelief...yeah sometimes golf is incomprehensible!!

morikawa's ball striking is unreal & on point, after the opening 2 rounds he's 6th in driving accuracy (21 outta 28 fairways) & 8th in greens in regulation (29 outta 36 greens)...let's ******* go!!

michael kim (70, tied for 34th): michael is hitting only less than half of the fairways (13 outta 28) in the first 2 rounds, gotta tighten that up tomorrow at the beach...kim's ELITE putting continues with 86 feet in drained putts for the round, fully expecting fireworks mañana with a coveted first group out tee time (with zero pace of play issues) off the 1st tee, let's roll baby!!

2026 kauai college tournament: 2nd round update

https://instagr.am/p/DUuKTFYEWwh
shhhh, don't tell nobody but my brah ziqin zhou is one of the TOP college golfers in the nation right now, once z figures this out too the championship trophies are all gonna be right in front of him, got it??

the rest of the team needs to chill the **** out & just play with SMILES on their faces (and quit making dumb **** decisions on the golf course particularly on the 519 yard par 4 6th hole which the team has played in a bull**** 12 over par in the first 2 rounds)

https://instagr.am/p/DUt5wZojafa
^ why the **** is shocky incomprehensible in this gram & failing to mention that ur gpa will affect ur future & ability to order the unreal spicy rigatoni with sauteed chicken (burp) with authentic san francisco sourdough bread at the low key old school vibe westlake original joes in daly city just minutes from the o-club??

Collin shot 10 under today! Haven't seen this level of confidence in at least two years. He's tied for 2nd and two back from Bhatia. Will be en epic finish tomorrow!

2026 crosby tournament: 3rd round update

Morikawa makes the most of moving day 🚛💨

A 10-under 62 moves @Collin_Morikawa into 2nd place @ATTProAm. pic.twitter.com/G7nkgewJu2

— PGA TOUR (@PGATOUR) February 14, 2026

collin morikawa (62, tied for 2nd): morikawa with arguably the GREATEST round in the history of cal golf!!!!!!!!!

11 BIRDIES with the lone bogey due to a not decisively struck miss to the right of the cup 3 footer for par on the newly grassed (still sketchy with mow patterns) recent green extension deep left pin position on the par 4 10th hole adjacent to the pacific ocean cliffs which is the windiest spot at the beach while hitting an unreal all 18 greens in regulation on a 15-30 mph wind velocity day on the spectacular monterrey peninsula

"When I first came out here and turned pro, I didn't care about honestly making cuts or top-20s, I came out here to win."

🗣️ Collin Morikawa (T2) @attproam pic.twitter.com/Qq3fqSwfIW

— PGA TOUR (@PGATOUR) February 15, 2026

points to consider with respects to tomorrow final 4th round:

1) collin (17 under par) is playing with the leader akshay bhatia (19 under par with max homa's best friend/former caddie joey greiner now on his bag), morikawa will know exactly where he stands & what he gotta do at all times...furthermore morikawa is a much better ball striker than bhatia which will be accentuated by the projected weather conditions

Collin Morikawa just posted the second best approach round in ShotLink history gaining +6.460 strokes in round three of the AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am. pic.twitter.com/V0FlisNm5I

— Rick Gehman (@RickRunGood) February 15, 2026

2) with high winds expected again tomorrow the pga tour staff will be agronomically slowing down the greens (to ensure balls on the greens aren't oscillating) & cutting the hole locations in relatively flat spots which will simplify putting for collin & facilitate an aggressive attack mode mindset on the slower putting greens

3) the 2 pga tour courses morikawa has played the most & is familiar with the greens reading are the riv (next week) & the beach (tomorrow)

4) the fans will be overall favoring the nor cal berkeley grad, this is a home game for collin

5) morikawa wuz raised by a tiger moms & like all haas biz ad grads is ******* tough as nails (nobody is harder
on us than we are on ourselves), competitive pressure is a luxury in life (to be embraced like a cbyf1, not a deterrent) & we do this **** with (almost) no effort

6) if collin prevails tomorrow we can expect the most emotional trophy presentation/post round interview evah by collin, he's older now & more appreciative of championships than back in the day when it all seemed so simple then in the way we wuz

michael kim: (71, tied for 47th): michael missed 8 outta 14 fairways on the windy day but always good vibes finishing with a birdie 4 on the most famous (along with st andrews) 18th hole in golf!!

2026 kauai college tournament: 3rd & final round

Zhou leads the Bears with a six under par third place finish‼️#GoBears pic.twitter.com/8pgK934y7c

— Cal Men's Golf (@CalMensGolf) February 15, 2026

ziqin, CONGRATS on the clean scorecard 4 birdie en fuego 66 to finish 6 under par for the tournament & tied for 3rd!!

but guess wut??

ur brah shocky don't think ur the 165th ranked collegiate player in the united states, there is ZERO doubt in my mind after watching you play in person/conversing with u and better understanding ur competitive mindset that ur a legit top 10 baller...today's 3rd place finish is not ur upside/destination, ur a CHAMPIONSHIP winning golfer & the monster truly believes that hoisting trophies is in ur future (and sooner than u think)!!

z, ur time is NOW, go be GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bottom line: cal is a GOLF school with endowment funding GREATER than the football program

to anybody doubting the journey, trust it, have FAITH that it's all gonna work out (most of the time)!!



https://instagr.am/p/DUrPn2Djfc4

Hole locations for the final round of the AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am pic.twitter.com/x94U4dyIM8

— PGA TOUR Communications (@PGATOURComms) February 15, 2026

caution: tucked far left pin positions on holes 8, 14 & 15#

Shocky1 said:

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Hole locations for the final round of the AT&T Pebble Beach Pro-Am pic.twitter.com/x94U4dyIM8

— PGA TOUR Communications (@PGATOURComms) February 15, 2026

caution: tucked far left pin positions on holes 8, 14 & 15#

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Colin preference for cut fades will be challenged.

Never heard the word oscillating used as many times in my entire life, than the last 30 minutes of coverage yesterday.

So happy for Collin to get the monkey off his back. Finally got the putter working to match his extraordinary iron play. Maybe this will be his year.

Such a great victory!!! So happy for him, and the awesome news of becoming a Dad. What a bonanza!!!