cal transfer portal entrants:

harrison taggart: future car salesman of the month winner in draper utah at age 30 after earning a degree from utah tech or something

daveion harley: reading books & **** while competing in the acc isn't for everybody in berkeley

both guys are throwing away potential generational wealth building berkeley degrees for wut??



cal's monster class analysis of current cal fb portal entrants: the only guys who should be targeted for aggressive resigning are tj bush and luke ferrelli

Shocky1 said:

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Source: Cal is set to hire Keith Bhonapha as running backs coach. Bhonapha grew up near Cal in Oakland and has coached RBs at Michigan State, Oregon State, Boise State and Washington. pic.twitter.com/DhscG6phO6

— Adam Rittenberg (@ESPNRittenberg) December 18, 2025

KABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

real talk: massive addition to the staff in coaching up (catching the ball will be a point of focus) the running back room with a track record of NFL development and future recruiting the islands (hawaii grad with rolo back in the day) along with trusting relationships with both berkeley student athletes & their bearent(s)!!

WELCOME back to oaktown (the home of the jet), keith!!

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cal transfer portal recruiting update:

keith got his #1 running back target in town this weekend on an official visit in washington transfer 6' 215 lbs adam mohammed from apollo high school in glendale arizona who wuz a cal's monster class target outta high school

adam is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.5 gpa & hates COLD weather!!

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (for those that wanna pursue generational wealth thru hard work at memorial stadium & in the classrooms of berkeley, this **** is NOT easy)

UCLA WITH THE SURPRISE ONSIDE KICK! pic.twitter.com/tlOkovmMQu

— CBS Sports (@CBSSports) October 4, 2025

check out mateen's off platform leg kicking angle with a perfectly placed kick to a gunner for the recovery!!

the jks of kicking#

https://instagr.am/p/DO1GAEFjfoq
2026 MAJOR acc opponent update:

north carolina state qb1 cj bailey is gonna return to the wolfpack, the bears roadie to charlottesville in the fall of 2026 is gonna be a battle!!

Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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Source: Cal is set to hire Keith Bhonapha as running backs coach. Bhonapha grew up near Cal in Oakland and has coached RBs at Michigan State, Oregon State, Boise State and Washington. pic.twitter.com/DhscG6phO6

— Adam Rittenberg (@ESPNRittenberg) December 18, 2025

KABBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

real talk: massive addition to the staff in coaching up (catching the ball will be a point of focus) the running back room with a track record of NFL development and future recruiting the islands (hawaii grad with rolo back in the day) along with trusting relationships with both berkeley student athletes & their bearent(s)!!

WELCOME back to oaktown (the home of the jet), keith!!

---

cal football recruiting update:

keith got his #1 running back target in town this weekend on an official visit in washington transfer 6' 215 lbs adam mohammed from apollo high school in glendale arizona who wuz a cal's monster class target outta high school

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DO2mPPkjqSh/

adam is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.5 gpa & hates COLD weather!!

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (for those that wanna pursue generational wealth thru hard work at memorial stadium & in the classrooms of berkeley, this **** is NOT easy)

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Muhammad would be a big loss for UW and a big get for Cal

One of the best bringing his talents to Berkeley 💯#GoBears pic.twitter.com/xIhCmrU9Iu

— Cal Football (@CalFootball) January 3, 2026

KABBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!

WELCOME ike hilliard, an experienced NFL guy with a criminal justice degree from florida that will bring some law & order to the bears 2025 season incarcerated wideout room!!

hopefully the ncca will rule favorably re: another year of eligibility for potential all american ball thief jacob de jesus & make no mistake about it that it wuz criminally insane to not give more opportunities until late in the season to explosive safecracker quaron adams

the monster likes ike!!#

Shocky1 said:

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cal transfer portal entry:

Thank you Cal
Ilb 6’2 230
3 years of Eligibility
St/Practice Film
ready to work. pic.twitter.com/mndRmbQHCM

— Eze Osondu (@EzeOsondu1) December 31, 2025

is eze gonna be a future buc-ee's employee at age 30??

https://instagr.am/p/CuIVTfIJZ2M
don't be a dumb azz (or "go be great" cleaning ****houses)#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (for those willing to do the hard work both on & off the field in the quest to build generational wealth, this path is NOT easy)

Best Universities in the World, 2024:

1.🇬🇧 Oxford
2.🇺🇸 Stanford
3.🇺🇸 MIT
4.🇺🇸 Harvard
5.🇬🇧 Cambridge
6.🇺🇸 Princeton
7.🇺🇸 California Institute of Technology
8.🇬🇧 Imperial College London
9.🇺🇸 Berkeley
10.🇺🇸 Yale

Times Higher Education

— World of Statistics (@stats_feed) April 29, 2024

---

cal transfer portal entry:

defensive back kaden cook is the latest texan joining eze osundu, ike okafor, lajuan owens & brandon high jr to throw away a berkeley degree

wowza, the buc-ee's career training program must be more financially lucrative than first realized by the monster, who knew??

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

We’ve got your back — God’s got your future. 🙏🏽 https://t.co/EtpioV3mIG

— S_Tupuola (@Silipa_T) January 1, 2026

georgia tech 6'2" 325 lbs center santana "tana" alo-tupuola from brownsburg indiana & a high school grad of the img academy in bradenton florida is gonna officially visit berkeley this sunday (along with asu & wisconsin next week)

So blessed to receive an invitation to play at the UA-All American game this year! @DemetricDWarren @dzoloty pic.twitter.com/L2t2chr9Id

— Santana (Tana) Alo-Tupuola (@SantanaAlo2) August 3, 2023

the aspiring future real estate broker got 2 years of remaining eligibility after starting 4 times this season for the nationally ranked yellow jackets & would be in a strong position to be the starting bears center during spring ball with the graduation of bastian swinney

tana, are ready for a poly friendly adventure in year round ideal cali weather without unbearably hot summers or freezing azz winters??

yeah sweater weather no es bueno brah

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

https://instagr.am/p/C1FFTsKsN6G
11.64 100 SPEED 5'11" 203 lbs utep explosive running back ashten "lil ash" emory from rockwall high school is gonna officially visit berkeley january 5th & 6th...emory rushed for 569 yards this season for the miners & got 3 years of remaining eligibility

Freshman tape!

All conference freshman RB
117 carries
569 yards
4.9 yac
6 total tds
673 all purpose pic.twitter.com/fivEisbwQP

— Ashten “Lil Ash” Emory (@AshtenEmory) December 9, 2025

lil ash is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.7 gpa & wuz named to the conference usa commissioner's 2025 academic honor roll

yeah the theatre arts major emory is an IDEAL fit in berkeley both on & off the football field!!

plus he got good hair (unlike the bears running back coach)

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including dallas)

https://instagr.am/p/Ce656jpOAo8
wake forest demon deacons 43
mississippi state bulldogs 29

congrats to underrated head coach jake dickert on turning around the wake football program (9-4), the deacons are gonna be a formidable opponent when they travel to memorial stadium in the fall of 2026 but more importantly hopefully dance/cheer coach christy (now selling real estate or something) will come outta retirement & make the trip too after looking at shocky aka yoga boy sideways the entire game during the bears victory in winston-salem in 2024!!

Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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https://instagr.am/p/CcGZW-0pwes
Dear Shocky,

How are you?

I am fine.

As a former ELITE worldwide fashion model with multiple online degrees, I am very proud to let you know that I'm the new Chancellor at SMU!!!!!! It's true, I interview really well!!

I really think your writing is very witty ("don't be a dumb azz, it's better to palm a tight azz") plus we both love doggy dogs, would you be willing to accept an Adjunk Professorship of Literature in addition to starting up our new Yoga/Meditation Master's Program? Realize that you're not credentialed yet as a substitute yoga teacher at Modern Yoga but we can do a workaround on that minor issue.

Look, I realize you can play literally any golf course on Planet Earth with one phone call/email but would it help your decision making if I can arrange a FREE membership at Brook Hollow which has been faithfully restored by your favorite architects Coore & Crenshaw?

Shocky, working together we can make SMU GREAT AGAIN and in any case I'm looking forward to meeting you at your pregame FREE buffet at Buc-ee's on Saturday November 30th, is this a clothing optional event or not??

I will even confidentially whisper in your ear my GPA!!

Respectfully yours,

Tiffany Von Strudel the Third
SMU Chancellor

P.S. > Agreed that clothes r for losers!!!

---

Dear Shocky,

How are you?

I am fine!!

Getting my nails done this morning at the Reverse Cowgirl Nail Saloon in Highland Park & thought you might be interested in my list of the TOP 3 people on planet earth that I would like to take a naked azz shower with in the very near future!!

1) Shocky, no big surprise there!!


^ editor's note: shocky goes to the lunch box every month for grooming, he never in real life got nasty azz hair on his belly or really anywhere like he does in this foto

2) Rickie Fowler, he don't gotta lotta STDs like DeChambo!!

3) George Bush, we need funding for a new Poli Sci building on campus.

See you Saturday morning at Buc-ee's, should I wear any underwear or NOT??

Hugs & kisses,

Tiffany Von Strudel the Third
SMU Chancellor

---

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Dear Shocky,

How are you?

I am mad at you!!

Wut the **** is Becky G doing at Buc-ee's??

DALLAS! y’all showed us so much loveee 💖 Gracias Ivan Cornejo for having me, let’s do it again sometime ☺️✨ pic.twitter.com/vdN7U59FwX

— Becky G (@iambeckyg) May 20, 2025

I may NOT be flying out after all for the Ponys game in Berkeley on Saturday November 29th (and if I do I'm probably going to hook up with Jacob de Jesus or Rino Monteforte after the game, which ever one of them isn't busy with postgame interviews), got it??

Don't even bother to ever call me again unless ur DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cordially,

Tiffany Von Strudel the Third
SMU Chancellor

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Looking forward to welcoming Cal fans to Texas! Remember, please keep protesting to a minimum, our oil keeps the country going! pic.twitter.com/Lgo2muJp4f

— The Deep Ellum🐎 (@3rdDownDracula) November 27, 2024

Dear Shocky,

How are you??

I'm tired of your prevalent discriminatory attitudes against Blondes, are you really too ******* stupid to understand that I'm only 2 appointments away at Zolton's from becoming a curvy brunette yoga female??

You wish you had played your cards right with me and taken my offer of an Adjunk Professorship!!

You ****ing smelly Berkeley Hippie!!

****ing AZZhole!!

Not your friend,

Tiffany Von Strudel the Third
SMU Chancellor

The way SMU fans talk about Sonny Dykespic.twitter.com/8QxnzlXzID https://t.co/qsPthfMqNG

— SuperFrog’s Burner (@SuperFrogBurner) September 15, 2025

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Dear Shocky,

How are you??

I would like to apologize for that last emotional outburst, when I mix my anxiety/depression meds with alcohol sometimes I say some really dumb **** that I don't really mean!!

So let's try this again, you know that Wilson and Ireland aren't really listening to any of your recommendations, would you like to become the next SMU Head Golf Coach??

Sleep on it yoga boy, ok??

XXXOOO

Tiffany Von Strudel the Third
SMU Chancellor

P.S. I'm allergic to dogs, is that going to be a problem in our relationship??

---

smu mustangs 24
arizona wildcats 19

yeah cal's roadtrip to dallas in the 2026 final game with smu (9-4) could be an EPIC battle for a spot in the acc championship game against miami

but wut the **** is shocky gonna do about cray cray town smu chancellor tiffany von strudel the third??

yeah ay caramba, no es bueno brah (sigh)

This is an Elite Group! pic.twitter.com/tbZ4KqXuHn

— Will Stein Burner (@CoachSteinUK) January 2, 2026

ALL DAI 🗣️🗣️🗣️

📺>>ACCNX#GoBears | #ThroughAndThrough pic.twitter.com/RDDezzJrti

— Cal Basketball (@CalMBBall) January 3, 2026

the magic of cal basketball!!#

https://instagr.am/p/C26PL_kLVfx
fun fact: there are no restrictions on the # of official visits a prospect can make during the january 2nd-januray 16th transfer portal window

but except for a relatively small # of superstars, if they don't accept an actionable offer quickly after their official visit then that slot will be given to another player (usually with a current conditional offer) visiting shortly thereafter so they can't **** around too long, got it??

swimming with the sharks (with musical chairs & a lot of guys left with no place to call home at the end of the day)#

Shocky1 said:

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cal transfer portal recruiting update:

https://instagr.am/p/C1FFTsKsN6G
4.45 SPEED 5'11" 203 lbs utep explosive running back ashten "lil ash" emory from rockwall high school is gonna officially visit berkeley january 5th & 6th...emory rushed for 569 yards this season for the miners & got 3 years of remaining eligibility

Freshman tape!

All conference freshman RB
117 carries
569 yards
4.9 yac
6 total tds
673 all purpose pic.twitter.com/fivEisbwQP

— Ashten “Lil Ash” Emory (@AshtenEmory) December 9, 2025

lil ash is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.7 gpa & wuz named to the conference usa commissioner's 2025 academic honor roll

yeah the theatre arts major emory is an IDEAL fit in berkeley both on & off the football field!!

plus he got good hair (unlike the bears running back coach)

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including dallas)

---

I like his GPA. But his reported 4.45 40 speed is grossly overstated. He does not run away from the G5 DBs chasing him. He has a decent initial burst but his 40 speed is not 4.45. He looks a bit too much like Brandon High for me.

100% 6956, hand held times can sometimes be wildly inaccurate

original post has been edited to include ashten's electronically timed 11.64 100 as a junior in a high school track meet

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

https://instagr.am/p/DRfK87JERDK
fcs freshman all american houston christian transfer 5'9" 175 lbs running back xai'shaun edwards from league city texas is gonna visit berkeley on january 8th (along with missouri on january 5th)

with grandpa rooting him on xai'shaun rushed for 1019 yards for the huskies in 2025 & got 3 years of remaining eligibility

https://instagr.am/p/DPNV2kJjVbc
plus xai'shaun is a big fan of stitch!!

https://instagr.am/p/DPKyq_NjYxE
the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university on planet earth (just ask lilo)

Shocky1 said:

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Shocky1 said:

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TBT pic.twitter.com/8uzVKaaEL8

— Isaiah Kema (@IsaiahKema) October 27, 2022

don't **** wit kema#

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isaiah kema is a ******* apex predator that got the human alligator death roll thing down, could he potentially start at center as a true freshman with driscoll sliding back to guard?

cal's monster offensive line (needs bad azz killer nastiness not st moritz finishing school niceness)#

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cal transfer portal recruiting update:

after a 2 year mission & this fall at ohio state center 6'3" 312 lbs center isaiah kema from lubbock (dad is employed by texas tech) is in the portal

the 4.0 gpa physical center got 4 years of remaining eligibility, probably gonna return back to texas but if isaiah is seeking a 4 year starting opportunity berkeley (took an official visit with his moms back in the day) is the best combination of athletics & academics in pursuing excellence both on & off the field while building a future that includes generational wealth (if that is a priority for kema)

Another angle of Notre Dame HC Micah Shrewsberry chasing a ref after the loss to Cal: https://t.co/L7EwQoMHUr pic.twitter.com/SteSpRBFAZ

— Joaquin Ruiz (@WalkingRuiz) January 3, 2026

the luck of the irish (ran out last nite)#

Shocky1 said:

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mr silverleaf sun angel golf buddy (harvard mba): meat to asu & bringing almost the entire ucla db room with him

https://instagr.am/p/DLQZ2R_T5zf

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mr silverleaf sun angel golf buddy text (shocky don't respond to texts but can read them):

"hey schulzie your boy mateen bhaghani is in tempe on an official visit, anything you want me to tell him??"

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

Former Ohio standout Wide Receiver Chase Hendricks has heard from these 16 Schools since entering the Transfer Portal, he tells me.

Hendricks totaled 71 Receptions for 1,037 Yards & 7 TDs for the Bobcats in 2025 & is ranked as the #9 WR in the Portal (#37 OVR.) per 247Sports.… pic.twitter.com/jBsqfW78QH

— JGPCFB (@jgpvisuals) January 2, 2026

uber productive ohio transfer wideout with 71 receptions for 1037 yards 6" 203 lbs chase hendricks from st louis is on an official visit to berkeley today (and will visit purdue tomorrow)...hendricks got 1 year of remaining eligibility

https://instagr.am/p/DSobiqHDql3
who wants to catch dimes from jks??#

Texas tight end Jack Endries is entering the NFL draft, he tells ESPN. He’s Mel Kiper Jr.’s No. 3-ranked tight end for 2026. He’s a Cal transfer who has 124 career catches, 1,376 yards and seven touchdown catches, flashing explosion and versatility. pic.twitter.com/uBAJUNlhZB

— Pete Thamel (@PeteThamel) January 2, 2026

berkeley grad#

You may remember him from this photo last year pic.twitter.com/C8oNpsTgTg

— AppStateNews (@WestonScambler) January 21, 2026

good luck to daz (didn't work out academically)#

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

Thank you god pic.twitter.com/HoMHX5INQ6

— Carter Vargas (@CarterVargas21) January 3, 2026

11.53 100 SPEED 6' 210 lbs wildly unknown uc davis transfer running back carter vargas from santa maria is gonna officially trip to berkeley

WARNING: DO NOT WATCH THIS CUT UP IF U GOT HEART PROBLEMS!!

⏳ 🤞agtg pic.twitter.com/Es7V4gbZS6

— Carter Vargas (@CarterVargas21) December 9, 2025

uc-berkeley=the home of NFL running backs (with high gpas)



ADMINISTRATIVE NOTE: this is the 9th consecutive post by shocky, he cannot post again unless there is monster reader posts/engagement per the rules of of the bearinsider.com

Good information Shocky, keep them coming!

Shocky1 said:

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cal's monster class readers fan poll:

what's your version of a FUN december golf outing??

option a) watching cade uluave (with no range warm up) toe hook a 7 iron 185 yards over the green on the steeply uphill par 4 1st hole at tilden park

option b) wake up at 5:00 am to accompany collin morikawa to his virtual golf league practice session with a FREE corporate hospitality dogfood breakfast with the highlights being morikawa giving u a putting tutorial on how to decipher/correctly read greens at the cathedrals of golf like oakmont & shinnecock hills with ZERO pre us open tournament week practice rounds & a slightly used signed zurich golf tournament cap from when homa & morikawa teamed up to miss the cut by 9 strokes or something


option c) playing a 5+ hour round with the cal men's golf team at lake merced followed by lunch at in & out which results in moto 15 minutes later hopping outta the van & hurling into some bushes at stonestown because he ordered the animal fries with extra mayo like a dumb azz
https://instagr.am/p/DSxbk2FDEWk
option d) morning yoga/meditation followed by a brisk sub 3 hour round at spectacular cabot point hardy (during which shocky finishes the 2023 golf magazine world top 100 list) on st lucia & then a fresh salmon poke bowl with a celebratory mimosa at the naked fisherman followed by afternoon spa services at cap maison overlooking the carribean ocean
https://instagr.am/p/DSS2jiuCUk1
option e) playing 18 holes in the italian countryside with elenora (who the starter conveniently ignores her multiple dress code violations) who after putting out on the 18th green seems (ur italian is even worser than ur comprehension of spanish) to ask u with a wink if u wanna help shampoo her ponytail or something
https://instagr.am/p/B1jTGCmIhlB
mon ami callixte, u know the right answer, comprendre??

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well option a did NOT age well, hard to believe that cade would throw away a berkeley degree after a couple of years of academic hard work but we'll see how his FINAL decision plays out...honestly if shocky reaches the conclusion that the bears as a whole are not truly interested in earning berkeley degrees he will be done with cal football as he got zero interest in professional sports (spent less than 60 minutes combined watching the nfl, nba & mlb in 2025)...at the end of the day shocky thinks cade will still stick with the tilden park deal & an ELITE college degree which will become part of his brand just like berkeley grads cam bynum & jared goff

Willing to do whatever it takes to retain Cade Uluave. Considering the following options:

1. NIL deal for unlimited Fogo De Chao in Emeryville
2. Unlimited range balls at Tilden Park
3. Naming my son after him*

*pending sign off from Mrs Ghost

— Ghost (@GhostofGarbers) January 3, 2026

as for option b shocky did watch the tgl for the 1st time this week & surprisingly throughly enjoyed the banter between the pros, the candid discussion of shotmaking strategies & most importantly the fantasy simulator crazy azz golf hole architecture particularly on hole #6 "the stinger"!!

"That was a disgusting swing."

(Still down the middle for Collin Morikawa.)

📺 @TGL on ESPN2 pic.twitter.com/pHviqHEB5a

— PGA TOUR (@PGATOUR) January 3, 2026

one of the appeals of pga golf is that nobody gets paid anything unless they perform well at a tournament, it's a meritocracy (which is also the case with college golf) just like the business world & make no mistake about it those with berkeley, stanford & ivy league diplomas are at a huge advantage in life...this is often lost on young people that don't have parent(s) or mentors from affluent socioeconomic backgrounds that understand how this **** works in the real world & that's just sad as the educated rich just get richer & the undereducated poor get poorer in today's ruthlessly competitive global economy that favors the well educated

shocky like his tiger moms (and apparently chancellor lyons too based upon his comments re: the high # of 1st in family college graduates among berkeley students) believes in the redistribution of wealth on planet earth thru ELITE academic opportunities at places like berkeley, stanford & the ivy league (which unfairly still favors admission for rich as **** legacy applicants which calcifies generational wealth among the 1%ers on the upper east side)...the monster does not believe in handouts other than FREE tickets for all berkeley students to all football & basketball games...let's be real here, 97% of the bears football roster would not receive admission acceptance letters if not for their football abilities, they've been given a golden lottery tix in life that only pays off after a lotta hard work & long hours in earning a berkeley degree...and a lotta dumb as **** commission driven agents & football coaches are encouraging these young men to throw away that golden lottery tix opportunity which is gonna have devastating consequences when they turn 30 years old & no legit path to economic success

anyways it drives me crazy that morikawa (who consults in depth his caddie on all non putting shots) won't involve his caddie in reading putts which sometimes results in avoidable perpetual misreads at cathedrals of golf like his ****show performance on the greens at oakmont but at a ******* tgl event will openly ask his playing partners to help with green reads...why the double standard??

"That's how I actually got into Cal man!" @MoneyLynch's high school yearbook photo is LEGENDARY pic.twitter.com/qLVuEFiPRW

— Omaha Productions (@OmahaProd) January 4, 2026

Members- It's official! Anastasia has been named CG1 and Joyce has been named CG2 for the 2024 season! pic.twitter.com/WCW2F0ggdg

— Club Pro Guy (@ClubProGuy) April 15, 2024

player compensation:

pro sports teams (shocky got organizations as current clients) with salary cap restrictions along with probably all power 4 conference football programs including cal allocate payments & in the case of college fb nil payments upon a defined salary structure table that differentiates the annual compensation on a sliding scale for rb1, te3, olb2, etc

so evaluating personnel accurately is really important with internal scouting critical for the retention of key players

challenges arise when a player views themself as a left tackle1 like nick morrow based upon starting multiple games & playing a lotta snaps but when the staff evaluates the player determines their overall play wuz usually mediocre at best for one of the worst rushing teams in college football...and so then the player has the ability to test their market worth as a perceived lt1 in the free markekplace aka the transfer portal

doms is clearly a cheerleader/flower designer1!!

https://instagr.am/p/DS_eXsOkR6g
got it??

After graduating from Cal in 2.5 years, I have entered the transfer portal with 2 years of eligibility! Thank you to all of the coaches and teammates at Cal🐻Excited for what’s next. pic.twitter.com/mETtQmfOlc

— QB belay brummel (@belaybrummel) January 3, 2026

the smartest bear of them all (and a reminder of why there's hope for cal football)#

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (including the beautiful people of ethiopia)

https://instagr.am/p/DTEy9NKDnCW
^ check out foto #3 on this gram!!

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

EXPLOSIVE +1 athletic (no joke) kansas transfer linebacker 6'4" 230 lbs jon jon kamara from desert edge high school in goodyear arizona is on an official visit to berkeley this weekend

jon jon is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.51 gpa (and gotta opportunity to earn an ELITE degree that will set him up financially for life)



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university on planet earth (including the beautiful people of monrovia liberia)

Cal is hiring Viane Talamaivao as offensive tackles coach and run game coordinator, sources tell @CBSSports.

The former USC standout offensive lineman was most recently co-offensive line coach at Stanford. Before that, he was an assistant offensive line coach at Oregon and USC. pic.twitter.com/vRED83643T

— Matt Zenitz (@mzenitz) January 3, 2026

KABBBOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!!!

WELCOME usc grad & former assistant line coach in both eugene & south central viane talamaivao as the bears new offensive line tackles coach!!

REAL TALK: the bears offensive line tackle play wuz overall beyond breaking ******* BAD during the 2025 season, tosh is implementing the multiple line coaching strategy employed by lanning in duckland...one of the key factors cited by tommy tofi in his flipping from cal to oregon wuz the commitment to developing o-linemen via multiple coaches tracking every rep, every snap during practice in the freezing azz level 7 hypothermia northwest

https://instagr.am/p/DTER1ofDXCN
yeah my brah famika is getting used to the idea (vic couldn't get the ucla o-line deal done, that potential coup is now off the table) but we're all gonna be ok once the **** dies down, poly culture is inclusive

Ain’t a town like it _\,,/ pic.twitter.com/bweD8csvaH

— Famika Anae (@AnaeCoach) December 31, 2025

cal poly-berkeley=the 9th island=within swimming distance of samoa

Shocky1 said:

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Jaylen Brown says even his mom was skeptical of his decision to pick Cal over a blue blood, but he wanted to challenge himself academically just in case basketball didn’t work out 💯

“If you’re good enough, the [NBA] will come find you.” pic.twitter.com/k56NJYqWCu

— White Noise Podcast w/Derrick White (@whitenoisepod_) December 30, 2025

cal men's basketball:

back in the day multiple mcdonalds all americans (shocky & his daughters shay and taylor family run cal's monster class targeted marketing segment of 15-20 readers) including jaylen brown read the MONSTER on a daily basis during their junior & senior years of high school



both then & now the branding decision for my yoga buddy has been to market jaylen as an INTELLECTUAL, brown's ultimate career path/goal is to OWN a NBA franchise



but there's ZERO chance that jb or shareef is gonna support cal basketball with shocky on the sidelines, that's just one of the unintended consequences of the termination of cal's monster class



cal's diamonds are forever class#

---

Jaylen Brown scored 50-points vs the Clippers and said he had a feeling during pregame warmups:

"I knew it before the game started. Like in warmups, I could just feel like every shot and the ball was coming off my hands super clean. My footwork felt great. I did salsa last… https://t.co/CLJOagHoZT pic.twitter.com/tnkLyJA1r7

— Celtics on CLNS (@CelticsCLNS) January 4, 2026

"i did salsa late night...had some great salsa classes"

building the cal's monster class (our work is never done) approved INTELLECTUAL brand#

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

Thank you UConn!💙🤞🏻 pic.twitter.com/IcfNoM1j0V

— Ben Murawski (@murawski_ben) December 28, 2025

the nation's top rated (in the transfer portal) BLOCKING in the run game left tackle connecticut transfer mountain man 6'7" 335 lbs road grader ben murawski from st thomas more high school in oakdale connecticut is gonna take an official trip to berkeley (currently on a visit to ****hole lansing & also planning to check out ucf & ****hole oklahoma state) & meet with with new tackles coach viane talamaivao...ben only got 1 year of eligibility remaining & gotta develop his pass blocking skillz in order to hear his name called in the 2027 nfl draft

yeah the bears tackles didn't really block anybody in the run game (there wuz improvement in pass pro) during the 2025 season, rb1 kendrick raphael is gonna luv the new look cal's monster offensive line!!



the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (for those tired of freezing their azzs off & wanna live in cali for an adventure with all those high waisty shorts on them curvy brunette yoga females)

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

all sun belt 14 game james madison transfer starting lockdown nickel 5'7" 180 lbs dj barksdale from south pointe high school in rock hill south carolina took an official trip to berkeley this weekend (and is now heading to ucla for a visit)

Last season was just a preview. pic.twitter.com/08WoZZzSdl

— DJ Barksdale (DB2) (@barksdale_dj) June 1, 2025

dj is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.65 gpa & wuz always on the honor roll in high school

plus he got good hair (unlike tosh)!!

the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked (not #5 like westwood) public university in the WORLD

cal transfer portal recruiting update:

https://instagr.am/p/DN-tgztiEzX
iowa grad/central michigan grad student transfer physical defensive back 6' 195 lbs brenden desfernandes from belleville high school in motown is gonna take an official trip to berkeley to check out the sights & sounds of the city by the bay on the left coast

brenden is SMART (and academically ambitious) as ****, he got a 3.23 gpa in the central michigan mba program

while a lotta guys (including some former bears) are gonna be ****** at age 30 with no legit career opportunities, desfernandes is using football to build future generational wealth

let's ******* go!!



the university of california, berkeley=the EPICENTER of the free speech/civil rights movement (and for those of us that strongly believe in protecting the most vulnerable in society which for shocky is them rescue doggy dogs)

https://instagr.am/p/DSspPFOEu1L