https://instagr.am/p/DXFXHt3AXYV ruh roh, the bears 3.75 gpa humble FAITH based qb1 from ewa beach is dreaming all day about drinking pina coladas instead of working on his tight window back shoulder darts in the vertical passing game!!
and somebody needs to tell starting offensive guard1 (og1) tyson ruffins that chocolate gatorades would make guys profusely vomit on gamedays, got it??
no wonder cal is 21.5 dog according to monsterloseurazz.com in the saturday september 5th uc championship gameday at memorial stadium, do u got ur tix(s)??
https://instagr.am/p/DXFXHt3AXYV ruh roh, the bears 3.75 gpa humble FAITH based qb1 from ewa beach is dreaming all day about drinking pina coladas instead of working on his tight window back shoulder darts in the vertical passing game!!
and somebody needs to tell starting offensive guard1 (og1) tyson ruffins that chocolate gatorades would make guys profusely vomit on gamedays, got it??
no wonder cal is 21.5 dog according to monsterloseurazz.com in the saturday september 5th uc championship gameday at memorial stadium, do u got ur tix(s)??
https://instagr.am/p/DMgbBxzTGky disagree john, berkeley grad valerie "vals" grimaldo is producing wildly engaging creative content that is revealing the personalities of our cal football student athletes, this is critical for growing the fanbase in today's highly competitive 6 second attention span economy in targeting the critically sought after under 30 years of age consumer/potential lifetime fan/donor
programs that fail to accomplish this are basically dying like the cal men's & women's hoops basketball programs which got ZERO ENERGY as evidenced by the absolutely abysmal continued acc attendance metrics at haas pavilion which is a function of non inclusive strategies...if potential fans feel no connection to the players (which wuz not the case during the cal's monster class era with my yoga buddy jaylen brown) they are not gonna show up on gamedays & trust me mcdonalds all americans wanna play on the largest stages with ******* crazy azz energy~~
while the restructuring of the current worthless non innovative marketing & creative content athletic department staff by sending out termination notices is strategically the right move for the university, it would be a MAJOR**** UP by chancellor rich lyons to allow the inept non berkeley grads jay & jenny who have surrounded themselves with non berkeley grads to do the hiring of the next marketing & creative content personnel, these ******* worthless bureaucrats have proven time & time again that they do not get berkeley
strawberry creek studios needs to hire berkeley grads that can deliver world class "authentic storytelling"!!!!!!
Yes, there’s a number of rounds that ANGC will say no to for me to go by myself and play by myself. That number is prob a little lower for me than a guy like Rory.
If you find a member to host you every time, there’s no limit.
let's be real here, michael (emboldened by cal's monster class social media messaging back in the day) now got more than a half a million followers with his authentic inside the ropes pga tour storytelling but when you actually go to pga tournaments the ONLY person to walk all 18 holes with him (other than occasionally his cbyf1 girlfriend) is his development coach/#1 fan the shockster
fact #2, kim missed the cut at the 2026 masters because of his lack of familiarity with the course's unreal nuances that take a lifetime to learn, got it??
so shocky feels entitled to tell you that michael's above dumb azz comments re: rory's 2026 strategy of multiple one ball practice rounds at augusta national in preparation for winning the masters wuz not a key factor is a honestly really bad take & reveals a lack of comprehension re: the intellectually complex architectural difficulties of world top 100 cathedrals of golf
guess what??
michael has never played this year's upcoming major sites at aronomink, shinnecock hills (got rained out of a round during the walker cup at my favorite course on planet golf the national golf links of america) or royal birkdale
and that's a ******* mistake if you wanna build a legacy re: playing like a champion on the largest stages in the game
but shocky is still gonna stand by michael moving forward, we all say/do stupid **** at times, right nando??
shocky has been very critical of collin's unwise decision to not play oakmont in advance of the 2025 us open which resulted in him misreading putts at a clown town **** show & picking a starting line off the tee not far enough left on the par 4 9th hole which resulted in 4 decimating bogeys...and morikawa has also never played aronomink & shinnecock hills tho he did play royal birkdale a couple of years ago
with generational wealth (career earnings on & off the course south of $100,000,000) morikawa got the financial resources to take advance scouting trips on private jets like rory, jack nicklaus & his childhood idol tiger woods to future major sites to familiarize himself with the designs shotmaking strategies & gain a significant competitive advantage
but collin would rather stay up all night with his headphones gaming with kurt kitayama & not following his poly brah's sage advice to get a yoga/meditation practice, does he really want to win a 3rd MAJOR??
the following is a reprint from cal's monster class back in the day:
visited this morning the recently opened nicklaus design group ferry point golf course just outside of nyc with panoramic views of the manhattan skyline
https://instagr.am/p/C7dS0GksHlA arrive from my upper east side central park hotel by cab at the clubhouse around 7:30 am to stretch & warm up at the practice facility
upon arrival the head golf professional tells me that ferry point's developer donald trump heard that as a golf digest & golf magazine rankings panelist that i had an 8:10 tee time and would i like to play with the donald at 8:20 am instead?
so i say sure, no big deal, let's do this
so we make the introductions on the practice green & the 1st thing i notice is that trump has the weirdest color hair ever (kinda yellow orange) & that he has total man boobs along with an oversized obnoxious red cap
i walk & carry my lightweight leather mackzenie bag while the donald drives a golf cart literally to within 6 inches of every green...just as annoyingly, we then proceed to play thru every group on the golf course in front of us (why does he do this, why not just take the 1st tee time?)...it's funny to watch people's reactions as he dictates the playing thru, some golfers are understandably agitated while others want a selfie with him on their phones, he very clearly enjoys all the drama he's created
so he tells us while we wait for the short par 4 8th green to clear that he thinks ferry point is one of the greatest golf courses in the united states (it isn't, there are at least two dozen courses on long island & the hamptons that are significantly better) & that he's qualified to make that statement because of his extensive travels around the globe playing golf, that nobody knows golf architecture better than him & that includes actual golf architects
so in front of his 2 buddies & his cart caddie i tell the donald that actually i'm one of the 13 guys (and the youngest) to have played the world top 100 courses & stare him down...total silence, one of his buddies who is the chairman of macys starts to laugh & donald play punches my shoulder kinda hard, he's been pwned...whatever
dude is an interesting guy but playing golf with him is not really a celebration of the game but more like riding a roller coaster
you're fired shocky!!#
👀 President Trump’s security detail has been spotted carrying anti-drone weapons designed to disable unmanned aerial threats. pic.twitter.com/JWxV1lTIi7
fun fact: shocky is the only berkeley grad in the history of planet earth that has been punched/assaulted by a sitting President of the United States!!
FANTASTIC day at pasatiempo with all 7 cali bears playing with poise & strategic purpose at one of the true cathedrals of golf, cal is in 2nd place at 12 under par heading into tomorrow's final round paired with leader usc at 16 under par, **** the university of spoiled children!!
ziqin zhou (65, tied for 8th): zhou played the final 12 holes in en fuego 7 under par!!...if shocky's brah z (currently ranked #71) gets a yoga/meditation practice this offseason to eliminate his back issues he's gonna be a top 10 player in the nation next year!!
https://instagr.am/p/DXI3D7ZjPP1 charlie bundy (68, tied for 6th): charlie's dad is a member of baltimore (five farms) which is also a cathedral of golf and a tillinghast (architect of san francisco golf club & winged foot east and west) gem, that savvy course management experience with a classic design is paying huge wall street dividends this week!!
https://instagr.am/p/DXIrEAKDHj7 trevor cox (71, tied for 8th): mr legoland high school true freshman is a quick astute architecture student re: the backboards, sideboards & trapdoors at pasatiempo, go be great trevor!!
https://instagr.am/p/DXHuvMyCUlt xihuan chang (70): huge bounce back day for chang...very consistent round with 3 bogeys offset by 3 birdies, great to see the true freshman rise to the challenge on one of collegiate golf's largest stages!!
siaho cong (71): finishes like a boss man with birdies on the 17th & 18th holes on national tv, the congshow is the only player in the field to not wear a hat/visor (sihao got good hair)!!
daniel heo (71): senior leadership is truly priceless!!
charlie berridge (71): charlie doing the santa cruz surfer hang after the round on the hillside behind the par 3 18th hole cheering on his teammates!!
https://instagr.am/p/DXHgpszklgc RED FLAG: the bears played the uphill 220 yard par 3 3rd hole (hardest hole in the tournament with a 3.60 scoring average) in 7 over par in the 2nd round...there needs to be a lotta player/coaches conservations re: clubbing and strategies to ensure UPHILL birdie putts or scrambling greenside shots on this monster hole...putting/recovery shots played DOWNHILL is basically kinda like running in the streets in the big city and the preamble to a scoring ****show, got it??
sione, why would a 4.0 gpa smart as **** true student athlete wanna go to asu (do u wanna get stds??), byu (do u really wanna sign the student honor code agreement in snowy utah??), kansas (do u realize polys don't thrive in freezing azz climates??) or oklahoma (why would anybody wanna live in a ****hole like norman for 4 years??)??
and what school is a 1 hour flight away on southwest on fall gamedays for moms & the fam??
brah, don't be a dumb azz!!
https://instagr.am/p/DPuJMiuEun5 cal poly-berkeley=the 9th island (for those that wanna live in cali while building generational wealth via on the field NFL coaching development & in the classrooms of the #1 ranked public university in the WORLD)
this worthless 12 person department is led by the unqualified, non innovative & lazy azz markeisha everett who attends every trade conference possible that's further afar from berkeley in her quest to learn more about tarp management for cal football gamedays which is probably why when kevin kennedy approached her last summer requesting assistance for cal's wildly FUN & successful national billboards campaign she wuz 100% disinterested & opted not to help out...markeisa is also the primary person along with her enabler general knowlton that has resisted offering FREE tixs to all berkeley students for all football & basketball games which has resulted in abysmal attendance this season particularly for the men's basketball program which is competing in a low energy non loud without a lotta students haas pavillion
associate athletic director, communications: jonathan okanes director, athletics communications: gerit van genderen associate director, football: kyle mcrae assistant director, field hockey, men's swimming & diving, softball: dermonte bond assistant director, men's soccer, men's & women's tennis: dean caparaz assistant director, football, rugby: cailyn genewick assistant director, women's golf, men's & women's water polo: michael jorgenson assistant director, beach volleyball, women's gymnastics, women's soccer: daniel moebus-bowles assistant director, women's basketball, men's & women's rowing: anish patel assistant director, volleyball, men's & women's track, men's gymnastics: samantha sunseri communications assistant, cross country, diving: kai smith communications assistant, lacrosse: jenny yeh https://calbears.com/staff-directory
when shocky recently emailed jonathan okanes & cailyn genewick asking them to update the academic profiles of every cal football player including the degrees earned at both berkeley & other universities they opted not to respond...there are no football games for the next 7 months, wut are they doing every day??
so what needs to happen??
this entire department needs to be eliminated immediately with future game reports written by the assistant coaches of the respective sports...shocky's last weekend phoenix open & women's softball reports each took less than 10 minutes to write & edit, this **** is not that complicated if u got a montera middle school writing proficiency
then new football general manager ron rivera with separate financials from the inefficient/non accountable athletic department can hire a highly motivated communications/marketing/branding professional (preferably a berkeley grad that bleeds blue & gold) that works 50+ hours a week that is passionate about all aspects of the golden bears football program including academic achievements!!...ron should also have the authority to declare that all berkeley students (including the poor azz kids from seaside not just the 17 mile drive trust funders) will be granted FREE football tixs to the fall of 2025 schedule in memorial stadium!!
yeah anybody donating to the cal athletic department during the university's upcoming BIG GIVE is kinda wasting their 5 bucks
Looks like LIV is dead. Glad no Cal guys defected to LIV.
Saudi Arabia’s PIF is on the verge of cutting its support for LIV Golf, according to a report by the @FinancialTimes.
Citing sources, the FT reported that an announcement on the PIF’s involvement with LIV could come as soon as Thursday, but added the final decision has not been… pic.twitter.com/Z0Few2kLrE
https://instagr.am/p/DOeDdHqAcuJ philbert, as someone who loves the beautiful (and imperfect) people of my daughter taylor's new adopted home of new york city & knows people that have lost loved ones in the 9/11 terrorist attacks upon the twin towers this is an emotional still unfolding development for me with geopolitical implications
first of all, **** the money grabbing pro golfers like jon rahm (who lives a couple of par 5s away from my north scottsdale tree fort), phil mickleson (a phony ****tard who has engaged in insider stock trading), bryson dechambeau (who participated in the anti trust pga lawsuit) & byeong hun an (former cal golfer who joined liv a couple of months ago stating he wanted to "grow the game in south korea")
the shockster is hopeful that there are meaningful consequences for these traitors & not an accessible pathway back to the pga tour and that the saudi arabia sovereign wealth fund does not fulfill their lavish contracts to them (with hopefully the only legal recourse involving saudi arabia courts, good luck with that ****)
my love & respect for collin & max (and sure let's throw in michael too despite never getting a liv offer sheet, he's my brah forever) is immense, we will never forget their loyalty/commitments to doing the right things in life (ur dreams should never be for sale) which is a core berkeley value/principle!!
Cal TE Taimane Purcell on his acclimation to the Bay Area and how the Hawaiian presence is helping him
“It’s definitely helped. Having all the polys, the poly house. Being around all the guys, cruising with all the guys in playing music and video games, it’s big for my mental… pic.twitter.com/1ip8s59geW
exciting tournament with our high gpa guys (not to be mistaken for the dumb ***** at oklahoma state) clawing back from a bad news bears ****show start (the 6 starters playing the first 5 holes today an abysmal 12 over par) to eventually finish an impressive 12 under par for the tourny & finish 2nd to the university of spoiled children by a stroke!!
cal basically locks up a ncca regional tournament invitation heading into next week's acc tournament at the shark's tooth in florida (adjusting to the grain in bermuda greens will need to be a point of focus)
charlie bundy (70, tied for 10th at 4 under par): playing the anchor position charlie got a little steep on his flip wedge on the par 4 17th hole & kinda chunky on his short iron to the par 3 18th hole but that's ******* golf, it's not a game of perfect (it's all about **** happening, learning from mistakes and moving on)...a terrific tournament for the william & mary transfer (charlie tole me at the 2025 ncca championship at legoland that he blueshirted last season to focus on his successful admission into the haas biz school)...bundy is gonna be a minted bro of wall street & a 2 time winged foot club champion by the time he's 30 years old!!
ziqin zhou (69, tied for 10th at 4 under par): after a lousy azz bogey/double bogey start my brah z played like his authentic boss man self & lit it up the rest of the way at pasatiempo finishing with a 15 foot KABOOOOOM deuce on the par 3 18th hole!!
daniel heo (69, tied for 18th at 1 under par): a fireworks 6 birdies round including a birdie on the par 3 18th hole after knocking it almost stiff, much needed production from the hard working senior with a calm demeanor!!
trevor cox (72, tied for 18th at 1 under par): mark my words if the skinny azz paperclip true freshmen duo of trevor & xihuan get into the gym this offseason & work on their bodies (including counting their daily protein grams) like our pga bears they both got unreal literally unlimited upsides!!
sihao cong (71, tied for 24th at even par): too bad the santa cruz intercollegiate don't award a blue varsity letterman's jacket to the guy with the best hair & the most positive attitude!!
xihuan chang (71, tied for 51st at 6 over par): not chang's best ball striking tournament (an uncharacteristic 13 bogeys) but gotta love his steely ice in his veins demeanor center cut drained 5 footer to save par on the 18th hole at a critical juncture in the tournament, x is gonna be just fine!!
very good tournament for our cali bears but not intergalactic santa cruz boardwalk fabulous, sorry no beary white song this time...
fun fact: ^ the lead singer kinda look like my guy mateen bhaghani
WELCOME sideline to sideline active insider linebacker 6' 230 lbs texas a&m transfer (teammate of fellow new bear edge defender solomon williams) tristan "tjaz" jernigan from tupelo mississippi!!
it's becoming very clear that coach lup & coach hutchings are prioritizing SPEED on d in an attacking aggressive scheme, the days of the inevitable bend and then ******* break are over in berkeley
tristan got 3 years of remaining eligibility to spearhead the bears d & earn a berkeley degree while pursuing the development of a fashion forward clothing brand
https://instagr.am/p/DXIKI9IAf5V fun fact: while there are NO sharks in the pacific ocean, alcatraz is really ******* further afar
tjaz (current ilb1) go on and on, nobody can understand how he swims so long!! ^ financial pro tip: just to be on the safe side tristan should buy some term life insurance for moms (tupelo mississippi is NOT the epicenter for developing olympic swimmers or something)
cal football is an inclusive family deal, the staff is targeting lucky's bro unblockable 6'5" 260 lbs defensive end miles issac schirmer from powerhouse corona centennial high school
the 3.5 gpa aspiring music producer is gonna check out berkeley's music program on his official visit june 11-14th
https://instagr.am/p/C4EWpASySp4 the university of california, berkeley=#1 ranked public university in the WORLD (ucla is a solid back up school for those denied admission to berkeley, stanford & the ivy league)
magnificent commitment for the cal football program with 3.5 gpa mr music man isaac miles schirmer, let's ******* go!!
miles, honestly think ur creative content will explode to new levels living somewhere new like the wildly diverse cosmopolitan san francisco bay area
and trust me ur moms wants u to make the best 50 year decision for urself but let's be real here she's thrilled she can visit with both of her boys on fall gamedays (and ima looking forward to our meeting in person too brah) at the same time in one place, got it??
yeah miles Isaac schirmer is mentally limitless (using his mind as a weapon) & gonna be making beautiful music, painting pictures that be his vision
collin morikawa (67, tied for 15th): the only contestant with a handicapped parking spot morikawa (moving better, less stiff legged this week, it helps that harbor town is the flatest course on the pga tour along with colonial & la quinta) is leading the field in driving accuracy (12 outta 14 fairways) & near the bottom in putting (42 feet of drained putts), collin is striping the ball with 2 140 yard approaches on par 4s knocked to within inches!!
michael kim (69, tied for 27th): after a slow start (3 over par after 3 holes) michael roared back shooting in the 60s!!...kinda wondering if he's gonna go shopping this evening with his cbyf1 girlfriend for the south carolina belle lily pulitzer fashion look??
https://instagr.am/p/CTmhe_2KpN2 max homa (70, tied for 44): finishing with a birdie 3 on the iconic par 4 18th hole at harbor town (see above aerial foto) is always a beautiful thing in the palmetto state, they got good chocolate fudge ice cream in the old school soda parlor (kinda like a southern fentons) among the shops adjacent to the lighthouse, burp!!
collin morikawa (67, tied for 15th): the only contestant with a handicapped parking spot morikawa (moving better, less stiff legged this week, it helps that harbor town is the flatest course on the pga tour along with colonial & la quinta) is leading the field in driving accuracy (12 outta 14 fairways) & near the bottom in putting (42 feet of drained putts), collin is striping the ball with 2 140 yard approaches on par 4s knocked to within inches!!
michael kim (69, tied for 27th): after a slow start (3 over par after 3 holes) michael roared back shooting in the 60s!!...kinda wondering if he's gonna go shopping this evening with his cbyf1 girlfriend for the south carolina belle lily pulitzer fashion look??
https://instagr.am/p/CTmhe_2KpN2 max homa (70, tied for 44): finishing with a birdie 3 on the iconic par 4 18th hole at harbor town (see above aerial foto) is always a beautiful thing in the palmetto state, they got good chocolate fudge ice cream in the old school soda parlor (kinda like a southern fentons) among the shops adjacent to the lighthouse, burp!!
Collin's bad back and crappy putting stats make sense. As a lifelong bad back sufferer (6'3" with a lot of weight in my longer than normal torso) putting practice is a literal pain in my ....
https://instagr.am/p/DXNcz4FAQgQ real talk: shocky's flip flopping football head coach endorsement for berkeley grad coach lup took place after last fall's north carolina game based upon additional information & jt's endorsement
shocky is also now on board with berkeley grads jaydn ott & fellow haas biz ad grad fernando mendoza, we ALL say do & say stoopid as **** **** at times
but don't worry the 1st person to demand the terminations of non berkeley grads jay & jenny still wants these worthless bureaucrats & their south of $500,000 each contracts non renewed july 1, 2026 & based upon feedback of multiple sources this week the monster is currently of the opinion that this is gonna happen
yeah cal's monster class is serving as a human resources evaluation resource to the #1 ranked public university in the WORLD, mr minimal social filter wuz the 1st person to tell u that we needed to cut ties with wyking jones, mark fox, cfo tom lowry, markeisha everett, general knowlton & ryan longwell too
let's ******* go, we're just waiting on a friend to do the right thing
2026 hilton head lighthouse tournament: 2nd round update
rickie fowler (honorary cali bear, 69, tied for 7th): post round press conference
"Yeah not happy about it but it's true that my 4.0 GPA Berkeley grad wife Allison married my sorry broken down 2.65 GPA worthless Oklahoma State azz in a pathetic attempt to make Shocky jealous or something, **** Cal's Monster Class!!"
"Look, if I would listen to Shocky and get a yoga/meditation practice like him I wouldn't have these ******* back issues, the reality is that the Shockster can walk 36 holes carrying his bag and then do 30+ crunches from a headstand position. I can't even sit on the potta pottys here by the lighthouse without pain, no wonder Shocky achieved a higher GPA than me at the Haas Business School."
https://instagr.am/p/DXNi7Ytlj6g max homa (70, tied for 46th): max, if ur game is strong enough to birdie the iconic 473 yards par 4 18th hole at harbor town 2 days in a row, then ur game is firing well enough on all cylinders to shoot a couple of low rounds in the 60s this weekend, got it??...remember, ur currently ranked #117 in the world & the top 100 will receive invitations to the 2026 pga championship at aronomink in philly, let's ******* go max!!
michael kim (73, tied for 61st): post round press conference
"Why does Shocky keep yelling every time I hit a good shot, "Demand the ball, Ivan, demand the ball!!!!!!!!!!" "Who the **** is Ivan??"
https://instagr.am/p/DPYkpzrDvuI delasalle high school spartans=the WINNINGIEST high school football program in the history of northern california ^ and producing really smart grads (like nemyah telona & zach brien) that almost all know (except for those dumb azzs that are geographically challenged or something in case you haven't figured it out yet) that berkeley is the #1 ranked public university in the WORLD
in a very fluid fast changing qb1 recruitment the staff is now prioritizing 2 time all state cali gunslinger 6'2" 215 lbs dane weber from chaparral high school in temecula, he had a great unofficial visit to berkeley last weekend as the only prospect in town
the ball just flies outta dane's hands with a clean powerful highly accurate throwing motion
Michigan ‘27 QB target Dane Weber with a clutch touchdown pass to put Cali Power up 7 in the final minutes. pic.twitter.com/tx7aZ0MmM2
dane is building "super close" (his words, not mine) relationships with coach lup after dinner at the limewood bar & restaurant and also coaches rolo & somerville who have tole him he's the #1 ranked qb1 on the staff's 2027 big board
https://instagr.am/p/DQKMuG_j6Y4 weber has also visited ucla & stanford and will be making a critical unofficial visit to usc tomorrow at which time he'll probably find out if he gotta an actionable offer or if the trojans staff is just ******* around and slow playing him
like the cal lineage of current & future NFL quarterbacks including 3.6 gpa aaron rodgers, 3.7 gpa jared goff, 4.0 gpa fernando mendoza & 3.75 gpa jaron keawe sagapoltele dane is NOT a dumb azz, he got a 3.8 gpa which would allow him to comfortably handle berkeley academics while spending time watching film together with the coaches 6 days a week year round in maximizing his NFL upside
yeah tosh learned a valuable lesson in the academically ineligible/flunking out 2.6 gpa zach maynard fiasco back in the day that ur qb1 gotta be the smartest bear of them all
dane is scheduled for an official visit during the bears 1st group recruiting weekend of may 28-31st
a NFL level qb1 at the college level is kinda like a winning lottery tix/a berkeley degree!!#
2027 high school quarterback recruiting update:
4-star QB Dane Weber is coming off a visit to Cal that he called “electric,” @adamgorney writes 🐻
“They make me feel like a priority. I feel that from every single person on the staff."
jaron, everybody wants a ride in ur whip from the poly house to memorial stadium but let's be real here, there's more than one way to traverse the berkeley campus brah
9/11 terrorist financed liv exhibition golf league updates:
according to ****tard ceo scott o'neill bryson "loves" everything about liv & a 2027 contract will get worked out after o'neill raises funding from private equity venture capitalists and all liv events are staged on world top 100 golf courses at the cathedrals of golf
whatever, **** phony insider stock trading phil mickelson, drama queen jon rahm (who got 24/7/365 armed security despite living in a heavily secured gated community in north scottsdale) & the morally bankrupt geopolitical lacking asu & oklahoma state golf programs (the primary feeding schools for brutal regime sports whitewashing)
fun fact: shocky has tole asu president michael crow multiple times in direct conversations that asu men's golf coach matt thurmond is a horrible role model for student athletes that is tarnishing the reputation of the university
https://instagr.am/p/DXSEMl8FsrP ^ dr shock thinks collin's collapsing back issues from the deep revetted bunker left of the par 5th hole green are a function of his stubborn FAILURE to not have a yoga/meditation practice!!
2026 hilton head lighthouse tournament: 3 round update
collin morikawa (69, tied for 19th): on the par 4 18th hole towards the red & white striped lighthouse collin unleashed a 330+ yard driver downwind thru the fairway into the rough & wuz left with a daunting 2nd shot from a downhill stance & in a semi filled divot...morikawa just smiles at the situation (getting upset is just wasted energy & for losers) & debates between a wedge & a gap wedge, he takes the longer club and flushes the ball well over the green...with another downhill stance he flops to 20 feet & then drains the par putt like a boss man!!
for the 2nd straight day, collin putted better on the back nine with more SPEED on his putts & luved seeing our cali bear bring in his trusted caddie mark urbanek for the confirmation read on the tricky made birdie 10 footer on the par 4 16th hole
max homa (74, tied for 69th): max wuz the best dressed golfer on hilton head today with the purple (not fuschia) shirt but despite his lulu lemon fashion splendora missed 8 fairways on the tight playing corridors which resulted in missing 10 greens in regulation...homa needs a bit more precision manana
michael kim (72, tied for 69th): over hooked balls into the alligator ponds on the par 3 4th hole & the par 4 10th holes along with a pulled drive outta bound past the white stakes on the par 4 16th hole no es bueno but there's always a chance to rebound with chipotle for dinner!!
fun fact: michael like collin also got back issues & needs a yoga/meditation practice, maybe they could save money & buy mats with a groupon discount from modern yoga or something??
Good news: got my back up as I was starting my warm up.
Bad news: I had bent my 3wd flatter earlier in the yr so I kept over drawing with this one.
Ended up hitting Max’s 4 wood and was really happy with it. 3/4 fairways.
2026 hilton head lighthouse tournament: 4th round update
michael kim (62, tied for 27th): how the **** do u shoot a 62 on the pga tour??...first of all u build up ur body with 10+ lbs of muscle in the last 18 months...and then despite missing half of the fairways (7 outta 14) & hitting only 11 of 18 greens in regulation u roll in 98 feet of putts & scramble a perfect 7 for 7, got it??
michael, ur a slam dunk to get an invitation to the 2026 pga championship at aronomink in philly & getting closer to also locking up invitations to the 2026 us open at shinnecock hills (hopefully u & michael weaver won't get rained out again) & the british open at royal birkdale
ur on the right path (with the monster's development/#1 fan ENERGY) to fulfilling ur legacy competing on the largest stages in the game (the MAJORS) at the cathedrals of golf!!...which is not to diminish that lawnmower trophy or something u won in iowa back in the day
demand the ball, ivan, demand the ball!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
collin morikawa (67, tied for 4th): collin, don't beat urself up re: the calibogue sound boat racing 3 jack national putts on the 14th & 18th holes, u r making a lot more putts when u release the putterhead (thereby avoiding the decimating misses to the right/short) with SPEED
but as someone who has played the last 17 world top 100 lists & played in more overseas windy conditions than u my honest opinion is that u kinda ****** up with ur 3 club selection off the tee box of the par 4 18th hole which left 180 yards into a brutal howling left to right SIDEWIND
look the monster realizes that u don't got as good a gpa as the shockster at the haas biz school but the smarter play would've been hitting driver again (yeah like yesterday) letting the wind blow it inland knowing that would leave u around 150 yards & more importantly directly INTO the wind which would've created an opportunity for a potential close proximity 2nd shot instead of ur azz wipe 2nd shot 60 feet right of the green, got it??
but kudos for ur play this week & particularly bringing in trusted caddie mark urbanek for a confirmation read on the tricky drained 15 foot birdie putt on the par 3 17th hole, teamwork matters in golf brah
max homa (69, tied for 69th): max, love u man but u need to grow the **** up & stop acting like sergio garcia/john homa or someone who can't control their impulses, is that the kinda dad/role model ur gonna be bro??
homa, ur officially now in cal's monster class TIME OUT, go stand in the ******* corner & think about ur bull**** petulant entitled behavior
https://instagr.am/p/DXUJxEYjMSd ^ trevor, not gonna lie to u, this video makes me oddly emotional, ur truly a really good ******* human being & that's a byproduct of good parenting...yeah the monster almost feels bad about questioning why u evah got a cal golf scholly from coaches wilson & ireland after an underwhelming amateur career highlighted by ur winning the mother/daughter 2nd flight legoland championship back in the day
hopefully u & xihuan went back for seconds (and even thirds) at the banquet, u true freshmen paper clip duo need to track ur protein grams & add club/ball speed in order to reach ur literally unlimited upsides
GREAT NEWS!!...in honor/recognition of his unreal ******* 62 this beary white classic song is dedicated to legit 2026 president's cup candidate michael kim!!
the staff is keeping a close eye (no official visit scheduled at this time) on fast developing 16 year old 6'4" 205 lbs football/hoops +1 athletic linebacker elyjah staples jr from marquez high school in huntington park
juju & darius, it's now or never so this **** is off the record, rite??
NEWS: Four-Star CB Darius Johnson is down to 4 Schools, he tells me for @Rivals⁰ The 6’1 165 CB from Riverside, CA is ranked as a Top 5 CB in the Golden State (per the Rivals300)⁰ Where Should He Go?⁰⁰https://t.co/sDE3yEnUsOpic.twitter.com/3lW2dD1FW7
ucla: solid back up school for those denied admission to berkeley, stanford & the ivy league
michigan: literally cold & snowy as **** in the winter & too further afar for ur fam to travel quickly/affordably on fall gamedays
oregon: worthless academic football factory for low gpa disposable gladiators plus eugene is a ****hole with no blacks/polys other than the ducks on the football team...and yeah phil can buy a cb1 in the transfer portal at a moment's notice relegating u to a cb2, u ok with that??
oklahoma: who the **** wants to live in ugly/backwards azz low key racist tornadoville norman for 4 ******* years??...kill me instead
miami: not a bad choice, shocky tried to convince his daughter shay to attend miami law school instead of her eventual choice denver law school but do u know how much airfare, hotels, transportation, etc are for ur fam to travel from the left coast to south beach on multiple fall football weekends??...and if u don't get paid in the nfl, ur gonna be working for tips valeting my wheels at sexy fish in brickell when ur 30 years old, u feel me??
listen to von, **** these other schools, they be from 63rd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the university of california, berkeley (a 1 hour southwest flight from lax/ontario to oakland on fall gamedays)=NFL development pipeline program for ELITE defensive backs
malakai, if ur interested in building GENERATIONAL WEALTH both on & off the field, none of these other schools are even remotely gonna open doors or are anywhere near the same academic calibre of berkeley, stanford & the ivy league
the people living in mansions in atherton & hillsborough are NOT oregon or washington grads, got it??
which program offers the quickest opportunity for starting/playing time??
how much time & money would it cost ur fam to travel on fall gamedays to these further afar outta state schools vs a 30 minute car drive to memorial stadium??
are u aware that polys ******* hate freezing azz cold winters & that they thrive in ideal cali weather with their inclusive poly family/friends??
cali is more FUN than midwest, northwest & deep south football factory ****hole lousy weather towns for low gpa disposable gladiators & their uneducated value play fans
don't be a ******* dumb azz (and always be singing in the shower)#
